Anonymous said: I'm breaking down , there was this guy I met on school camp this year we became close I introduced him to my best friend when me and him were close they automatically clicked , the day I told my best friend I was going to ask him out she arranged it so she could go to his house on the weekend and ask him out they dated 5 days then they broke up and me and him got close again we hooked up , he sent me a dick pic I showed it to a friend and she told the teachers who got me suspended continued...
Continued … He Dident get suspended , that was 6 weeks ago , now he dosent talk to me he bullies me for something I was born with , and his mum and my mum are close and he has a mental illness like me too , now he’s self harming and is threatening to kill himself to my friend , and my mum says I should stay out of it but I’m worried about him I tried to talk him out of it but he blocked me
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I can’t imagine what that must be like. I know it’s hard, but…I think your mom is right. Especially in situations where your own mental health is at risk and you need to take care of yourself, it’s really difficult and sometimes unhealthy to try to take care of others. It’s so so hard to accept, but you can’t control what other people do or how well they are. You can definitely give advice or be a shoulder to cry on or just be someone to listen if they reach out to you, but make sure it’s not getting to the point where you feel like you’re responsible for someone else’s well-being. You’re not. If he’s unwell, it honestly doesn’t have anything to do with you. Obviously, that doesn’t mean you can’t be upset or worried or sad—you have a right to feel whatever you feel. Especially when it’s someone you care about like this. But there’s only so much you can do.
You can reach out to your friend, see if she’ll let you know how he’s doing. Talk with her and maybe plan to reach out to his parents or someone at school he could talk to, whether a teacher or counselor or otherwise if he’s close with anyone. And your mom is close with his mom, so you have a connection there that you can maybe get updates on how he’s doing. But ultimately, know that if anything were to happen to him or if he is depressed, you don’t need to take on any guilt about that. It’s not your fault he did the things he did, and it’s not your fault that he’s going through this. In a way, you might have to detach yourself…which I know is much easier said than done. It’s difficult to step back from situations like these, but I don’t want his struggles triggering things to get worse for you, lovely. You have to put your own oxygen mask on first before you try to help someone with theirs.
Sidenote, that’s completely wrong that you got suspended (for his actions!) and he didn’t. That makes me so angry. That’s awful.